forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize
