going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
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