OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
Randomize
