I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
Randomize