Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
