that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
Randomize
