yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
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i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
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You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
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