i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
Randomize
