its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
so let's talk penis.
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
Randomize
