I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
I never want to see another naked old woman again.
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
Why is your signature on my underwear?
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
