I called the bartender Mr. Intoxication last night. He thought it was funny until i threw up and blamed it on him
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Randomize
