seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
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