Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
I want you more than these girls want KFC
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
Randomize
