you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
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