Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
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