Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
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