I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
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