Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
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