i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Why do all the Father's Day cards talk about what a great dad they are? Why can't there be one that says something like "Thanks for sticking it to mom and making me possible, your sperm was appreciated."
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
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