if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
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