And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
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It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
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I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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