he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
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