so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
