OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
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