HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Randomize
