I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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