R you on birth control?
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral