and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
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