it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
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