so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
Randomize
