i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
Randomize
