Dual....:-)
Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
when I was too drunk to walk on my own two feet, he stole a shopping cart from the grocery store at the corner and proceeded to wheel me back to my apartment.
Then he tucked me in, gave me a goodnight kiss and slept on my sofa. I woke up this morning and he was making waffles.
he is a god among men.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
Randomize
