She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
My motherfucking vibrator ran out of batteries right when I was about to orgasm. It's like he's possessed everything sexual in my life and has compelled it to NOT SATISFY ME.
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
Randomize
