My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
Randomize