If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
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