last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Randomize
