I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
Randomize
