Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
Randomize
