perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
my tampon string is in my asshole... do you think i can get it out without anyone noticing?
i'd get off the bar first.
I unwillingly was the ball between four hungry hippos last night. I thought the one chick was actually going to eat me
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
My life is pants optional.
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
Randomize
