Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
Randomize
