What the fuck I just showed up to court still drunk and the judge told me I smelled like his wife
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
Randomize
