Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
I love you like a cupcake loves an overweight child, very similar to the mannerisms of a whole cake but personal, and minus the commitment issues, plus just the right amount of icing; not to mention the convenience of mobility, and only a smidgen of the guilt😘
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize
