he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
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seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
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Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
I believe in your delicious
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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