maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
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