hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Randomize
