Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
God, you're like boner-b-gone
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
Randomize