Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
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