Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry sammmieee hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(214): View more from Texas

Big sunglasses are the new paper bag

(817): View more from Texas

ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex

Fav 38 3287 1048
share tweet
(248): View more from Michigan

Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.

Fav 43 1649 7351
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(501): View more from Arkansas

I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.

Fav 19 4737 2230
share tweet
(816): View more from Missouri

Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.

Fav 15 4699 1396
share tweet
(260): View more from Indiana

I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me

Fav 6 1080 3168
share tweet
(814): View more from Pennsylvania

All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"

Fav 6 3021 1371
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(423): View more from Tennessee

Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...

Fav 11 1769 1030
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(404): View more from Georgia

Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.

Fav 20 1459 785
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(770): View more from Georgia

It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!

Fav 0 61 15
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT