Skipping work because i'm still too drunk from last night still. got home at midnight and passed out in front of my door for 2 hours bc i couldn't find my key
had to call my rooommate to let us in. Passed out in my dress and found the key on my hair tie-in my hair- just now.
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
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He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
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He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
In case you wake up wondering why your eyes hurt... You were claiming to be Zeus and that mortal weapons couldn't harm you. Some chick took it as a challenge and pepper sprayed you. Sorry dude.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
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