i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
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