Tell her she can't have a vagina
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
I intend to get homeless drunk
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Randomize