My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
Randomize
