If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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